Practice Patience While Goal-Setting

Hey, there! Happy New Year!

So, what goals have you set for this year? How many do you have? How long do you think it will take to reach them?
It doesn’t really matter how many goals we set, and the time limit we place on them if we aren’t going to be kind and patient with ourselves.

We are in such a hurry to reach this goal by this time because this may or may not happen for us. So, when we fall off, mess up, or fail and we get hard on ourselves. We say things to ourselves that we would never say to a friend.

I know some people who claim that if they aren’t hard on themselves that they wouldn’t get things accomplished. I think they tend to cloak perseverance with negative speech and say that it’s working. It’s like trying to get your car to start, calling it “stupid”, and claiming that it worked. When really you just kept pressing the gas pedal and turning the key in the ignition.

Negative speech and actions towards ourselves don’t propel us in progress. In fact, they put a damper on our mental, physical, and spiritual health. They pollute us from the inside and we can’t grow with that. We can’t progress efficiently and fluently as we should with pollution. We need positive and encouraging words and actions to fertilize the growth we hope to accomplish.

Six Ways to Practice Patience While Goal-Setting

  1. Prayer and Meditation.
    Speak to God, listen to for a response, and repeat it to yourself. This can be best accomplished when you have at least 20 minutes of quiet time to yourself. During this time, you could talk to God about your goals, ask for guidance, and listen for any internal response.
  2. You Need to Practice Holistic Goal Setting.
    This is a great thing to do when you aren’t sure if you are setting the right goals for the right reasons. It helps you to break down your goals and put them into action. And it’s super useful to help you keep your goals in check throughout the year.
  3. Check Your Thoughts!
    Make sure your thoughts are something you would say to a good friend. If you wouldn’t call your friend “stupid, ugly, disgusting, nasty, etc.” Then, don’t say those things to yourself. And don’t think that those “I can’t ever…” or “I won’t ever…” thoughts don’t count. They do. Even the thoughts of what others have said to you or about you, don’t give them room.

Whatever you say to yourself or have on a mental- loop sets the vibe of how you will move through your life. Our words, even the ones in our head have power. We have power in our words. In my opinion, our words have just as much power as our actions, if not more. In fact, we tend to say what we are and what we will do in our head before we twitch our muscles to speak it or do it.
Check your thoughts gets easier the more you do it. You must put it into practice.

  1. Speak Life and Truth to Yourself.
    The best way to check those toxic goal-stomping thoughts is to replace them with good and true things.
    Example: “I can’t stick to healthy eating habits. I can’t do anything right!”
    Replacement: “I can do things right. I just didn’t care to eat well today or yesterday. That’s okay. I can do better with my next meal. I’m still learning how to eat better.”

You can say other things to yourself like…
“It’s okay to make mistakes. No one gets everything right.”
“I think my hips and thighs look good and strong.”
“My life is supposed to be like my life and not like anyone else’s life.”
“My past has shaped me, but it doesn’t determine my future.”

  1. Have Inspiration Without Comparison.
    You’ve probably heard it said before that “comparison is the thief of joy”. It’s so true and it’s too easy to fall into.
    We create Pinterest pages and mood boards with our home-goals, body-goals, and relationship-goals. Those are perfectly fine to have. However, we assume that those perfectly photographed goals are better than who we are and who we’ll ever be.

There is a difference between thinking “I would like to be toned like her.” and “I wish I could look like or be her”. The latter is the type of thinking that causes us to abandon ourselves and focus on something that, in its exact form isn’t meant for us. What is for us will fit us in a way that fits no one else. It’s like a custom-made shoe.
Set up your Pinterest boards, mood boards, and Polyvore pages with your ideas and goals. Use them to plan how to get from where you are to where you want to be.

  1. Trust the Process.
    The process to get from where you are to where you want to be, again is like a custom-made shoe. Your process won’t look exactly like someone else’s even if you started the journey together. The process that we go through isn’t supposed to be easy. In fact, it’s supposed to be a refining process. It’s supposed to cause you to be stripped of all that isn’t good and/ or necessary for you.

The best way to trust the process is to look back and think of moments when the process seemed unnecessarily tough while it looked to be a breeze to someone else. Think about the people who aren’t by your side anymore. Think about what you don’t do anymore or believe anymore. Think about all the new information and skills you’ve gained because of what you went through.
All that matters because it adds up to who you are today.

We must be patient with ourselves if we want to succeed at anything. Things are supposed to take time. Things are supposed to be tough. You are supposed to overcome all those obstacles.

It will work out. You will succeed.

Related Posts: 

5 Holistic Approaches to Goal-Setting You Should Do This New Year

A Ritual for Intentional Goal-Setting For 2018

Which area of patience with yourself do you need to practice more?
How will you start?
Have you read the 5 Holistic Approaches to Goal-Setting You Should Do This New Year?
Let me know in the comments.

Ebony/ Coilysue86

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